First dates can be a lot of things: great, funny, horrible, and embarrassing, to name a few. I’ve rounded up a few of the funniest and most relatable #FirstDate posts on Twitter that will make you and your boo laugh until you cry. Check them out!
01. ONLINE DATING DECEPTION.
[First Date]
Her: Sorry, but your profile pic was misleading.
Oatmeal Raisin Cookie: I never *said* this was chocolate. You just *assumed*
— 🇺🇸Frank Whitehouse 🇺🇸 (@WheelTod) August 2, 2017
02. GETTING ANSWERS TO LIFE’S IMPORTANT QUESTIONS.
take her swimming on the First date so u can see if she got an innie or an outie
— i need a girlfriend im 6’4 (@ilooklikelilbil) July 26, 2017
03. SO, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR WORK?
[first date]
Her: Good Will Hunting is my favorite movie
Me: (trying to impress her) i'm a janitor
— Hyde (@frogshack) July 25, 2017
04. CONFIDENCE IS KEY.
[helping son prepare for first date]
"what if she doesn't like it"
*stuffing handkerchiefs up son's sleeve* be confident in your magic, son— brent (@murrman5) January 19, 2015
05. IT’S NOT STALKING, IT’S RESEARCH.
[first date]
ok dont let them know i stalked them online
them: my aunt–
me: theresa or sharon— gary from teen mom (@garyfromteenmom) November 7, 2015
06. I ONLY SWIPED RIGHT BECAUSE YOUR DOG IS CUTE.
[1st date]
Maybe next time i could meet your dog[2nd date]
Your dog is so cool[3rd date]
Do u mind if me & your dog hung out without you— Lazy dog (@LaziestCanine) October 22, 2015
07. CRAFTS, I DO CRAFTS.
First date
Him: What do you do?
Me [pulls out a Victoria's Secret catalog that I've clearly glued photos of my face into]
"I'm a model."
— elizabeth williams (@Elizasoul80) October 28, 2015
08. ROMANCE IS ALIVE AND WELL IN THE 21ST CENTURY.
[first date]
her: so what do you do for fun?
me: waste my life on the Internet
her: same
[we both go back to staring at our phones]
— paperwash© (@PaperWash) January 6, 2016
09. MOTHER KNOWS BEST.
first date
Her: omg are you wearing a cape? Lol
Me: [texting mom] ok you were right about the cape
— Chance Blankenship (@_csjb_) January 6, 2016
10. AWKWARD IS, AS AWKWARD DOES
No matter how old I am or how good my hair looks, I will always be awkward on a first date.
— Sugar Jones 👣 (@SugarJones) January 6, 2016
11. IMMEDIATE DEAL BREAKERS.
*on a first date*
Hostess: would you prefer a table or booth?
Them: Table.
Me: We're done here. pic.twitter.com/GfbzWE6dyV
— ϯ (@trapticity) May 4, 2017
12. THE WAY TO A WOMAN’S HEART IS….
I went on a first date last night where a guy kept calling me captivating and then interrupting me. We are in love.
— Daralyn Kelleher (@deekizzle) April 27, 2017
13. HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY
*First Date*
Her: Hobbies?
*thinks about the 50,000 piece Lego Death Star I'm building*
Me: Architecture and Astronomy.
Her: Impressive.
— pookie (@Kollelorcollege) May 1, 2017
14. PLEASE TELL ME HOW GREAT I AM
[spends a year not dating & learning to be the source of my own validation] I'm great
[3 seconds into first date] HI HELLO DO YOU LIKE ME
— Ari Scott (@ariscott) June 8, 2016
Aren’t you glad you’re not single anymore?
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